Diary Dearest

Diary Dearest

No More Self Doubt

No, I Am Not Available


Two generations, two different points of view, one same concept:  Dare saying No!

The young:

How to say no. None of us want to hurt someone else’s feelings. However, sometimes it is necessary to find the power in yourself to say no. I am not talking about an angry “no” but more of a compassionate and understanding “no.”

If someone needs your help and you can’t answer this demand, start explaining your current situation: “I usually spend my Sunday afternoon gardening with my kids” followed by, “As a result I won’t be able to come with you” ending with “but I would love to do it another time”. People always remember the END. You can be the nicest person with the nicest excuse– they will always remember the last words so be careful. Don’t wait for someone to ask you something, practice in front of a mirror to be more confident in your affirmation.

The restless:

“No,” I am not available, “no,” I can’t help, “no,” you may not stop by and never leave, “no, I will not…”

It is OK to say “no,” and in most situations an explanation is not required or necessary!  Say yes to advance planning with some intense soul searching.  Be honest with yourself regarding your circumstances, priorities and obligations.  Do practice in front of a mirror. Give yourself permission to say “No” and prove you mean it with daily practice.  Remember: when saying “No,” make direct eye contact. This your life…

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